


Too-Tall Shoes and Mixed Emotions

by meltheknee



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Akira's trying his best, Almost forgot that tag haha, Believe it or not this was originally supposed to just be fluff, Developing Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Gay Panic, Goro "tf is an emotion" Akechi, Height Differences, It's just Goro running himself into a hole, M/M, Oneshot, Panic Attacks, Self-Esteem Issues, Theres some mentions to vanilla P5 stuff but nothing crazy, light spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:49:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27994800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meltheknee/pseuds/meltheknee
Summary: Goro Akechi didn't expect Akira to request him to stop by Leblanc so abruptly, but after some internal debating, he goes to see him. Of all the things he expected, seeing Akira in platforms was far from it. Faced with an unusually confidant Akira, Goro does his best to not seem flustered.In which, Akira did a thing. Is that thing impulsively buying a pair of 4" Demonias? Oh of course it is. Also idk how this became angsty but Goro's an angst guy so-
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49





	Too-Tall Shoes and Mixed Emotions

_"Okay, so, I did a thing."_

Akira's text is unusual, Goro’s used to his tendency towards short texts and forgetfulness at starting conversations. He's lost many hours to analyzing his texts for any details that might hint at aversion. Whenever he talks with Akira, he can never pick-up on an ulterior motive, it’s strange. It’s clear his friends don’t like him, understandably so, but Akira seems to _enjoy_ hanging out with Goro.

Goro scrunches his face lightly, contemplating how to take on the conversation.

Slouching into his living room couch, he scrutinizes the message, and replies, _"I would assume you do things. Is there a reason for this to be unlike any other?"_

He deadpans at what he sent, wishing he'd remember to stop being so formal. 

Picking at his phone case, he anxiously watches the indicator of Akira typing flicker in and out. Goro purses his lips and puts his phone down for the time being.

He stands up with his arms crossed, tight, across his chest and ponders what he’s up too.

Knowing Akira, it’s likely that all he did was buy something strange. Perhaps he bought Morgana a cat costume or something idiotic like that. It would undoubtedly be cute, but Goro knows that it’s doubtful that the cat would appreciate it. That probably wouldn’t stop Akira though.

Goro run’s his fingers through his hair and tugs at the ends. The hum of his air conditioner sends him further into the depths of his thoughts.

There's too many ways this can go. It is also possible that he and Ann are up to something – Goro detests what those minds could come up with.

He's pacing now, _‘okay, so, I did a thing’_ repeats throughout Goro's head, accompanied by Akira’s narration. His thoughtful scowl is interrupted by the hum of his phone. Realizing he's been walking around, Goro blinks slowly before moving to grab his phone – quicker that he would care to acknowledge. 

_"Are you free right now?"_

The text is as simple as any – leaving Goro lost to its implications. 

With a disinterested stare, he checks the time for the sake of it. It’s only three in the afternoon, there’s still plenty of time left in the day. As to not seem eager, he waits through a dull beat of silence before replying with a swift: _"At the moment yes, I presume you would like me to stop by Leblanc."_

He doesn't care to make it a question. Goro likes to think that for all the confusing parts of Akira, he still knows him well enough to predict his answer. He knows that there isn’t a point to this little outing, it’s all fluff – but he has nothing else to do today, so why not. 

Why would Goro ever pass up the opportunity to see Akira potentially embarrass himself with some idiotic scheme. 

With his phone in his back pocket, Goro walks in stride to check that he looks presentable in his bathroom mirror, touching up his concealer from an earlier outing. Some of it has rubbed off, a tinge of red-under eyes and freckles peer into his narrowed gaze. Beauty blender in hand, he hides his too-pale reflection and sour attitude under cover-up. 

While checking that his hair is neat with a ‘charming’ hint of messiness, Akira chimes in, confirming Goro's assumption with a simple thumbs up. 

He smirks at the subtle victory – though also berates himself for being so petty. He leaves the bathroom and closes the door a little harsher than intended. 

With his shoes on, he exits his apartment and locks his front door. He stares at the door for a moment longer, contemplating if this truly is a good choice. But alas, Goro has never been the best at managing rash decisions. 

Going down the stairs two at a time, Goro resists the urge to kick the railing at his antics. He knows that he tends to let loose a little when alone, but it does nothing to soothe his anger at the fact. 

Outside, the weather is still hot – the notion of a cool September lost to the heat. Goro continues to ponder what Akira is up to, imagining the grin he'll probably have on his face. His shoulders stiffen as he continues to the subway. 

His pace is swift, Goro would prefer it if none of his fans noticed him, it would be annoying if he had to present a soft smile while his mind was so preoccupied over Akira’s text. 

The subway is incredibly humid and Goro struggles to breathe as he moves onto the train. His sweater vest seems more stifling than usual. 

In all honesty, he's not sure why Akira decided to message _him_ of all people, he could've easily told someone else about his shenanigans – surely his _friends_ would be more invested in it. Though, this fact makes his heart skip and mouth curl upward slightly. The notion that Akira went out of his way to want to tell Goro about whatever he did. To want Goro to go over and show it to him in person. At this thought, he clenches his left hand tighter onto the overhead rail and bites his inner lip; he really shouldn't let this get to him. 

Distance is important, but it can be nice to let go this one little time, it should be harmless. Most likely. 

This whole “adventure” to Leblanc is doing too much to rattle Goro, and it upsets him greatly. 

Yongen-Jaya approaches and Goro steps off the train, the route to Leblanc memorized. And with the tell-tale chime of Leblanc's bell, Goro is greeted with an empty café. 

The soft browns of Leblanc, accompanied by the strong scent of coffee, always seems to relax the constant tension in Goro’s shoulders. Luckily, the temperature in here isn’t as warm as outside. 

He steps in and he hears someone rustle around in the attic. 

"Quite unprofessional to leave the café unattended Kurusu," His voice is light and sarcastic, Goro snickers below his breath and moves to his usual seat. 

Goro then picks up the sound of paws padding across the floor. He glances to his left and spots Morgana walking toward the front. He pauses and looks up at Goro, sighing. 

"He's _such_ an idiot.” 

Goro looks at Morgana with mild confusion, Morgana finds a way to replicate the emotion. He paws at the door, continuing to assume Goro cannot understand him. As it’s easy to interpret what the cat wants, even if he couldn’t hear him, Goro gets up to let him out. At the sound of the door, Akira yells from upstairs. 

"Gimmie a sec Akechi! There are some. . . Unforeseen troubles that come with the. . . _thing_ ," He sounds a bit frantic and Goro sits back in his chair, crossing his legs and tapping the counter while he waits for the thief to come downstairs. 

"Okay, I swear this was a good decision – I just need to get used to it," He sounds slightly breathless, lost to some mundane anxiety. It has Goro intrigued to say the least, raising a brow, and leaning on his left arm that rests across the stool’s backrest. 

Stuttered steps resonate throughout Leblanc as Akira slowly makes his way down the stairs. 

Goro begins bouncing his crossed legs, eyes darting back and forth from the stairs to whatever knickknacks are around Leblanc. He’s not desperate to see what Akira is up to, so he’d rather not keep his attention only where Akira is to come from. 

"Well, surely there must be a reason your cat seemed annoyed enough to want to leave," He draws out his words, teasing Akira as the other teases him back with every too loud step he takes. 

"He's just a buzz kill, don't worry about him." 

"So, before I finally see what the thing you did is, should I be preparing myself? Is it oh-so life changing that I need to mentally prepare?" 

Goro laughs under his breath, letting his guard down with a smirk he reserves for the confines of his own head. Though, he realizes, the surprise can still go any which way, and he straightens up with a neutral expression – one teetering with an unnoticed hint of adoration. 

"Jeez, finally,” Akira says under his breath, before he walks away from the stairs, “Okay, so now that I finally made it down, get ready for the new Akira." 

Smug with a hint of Joker’s smirk, Akira struts over to Goro, wobbling slightly and testing his ankles. With a slow blink, Goro takes Akira in. 

Hand on his right hip while the other sways at his side, Akira is wearing a pair of high-waisted jeans, a loose tucked-in dress shirt, and decided against wearing his glasses. But, aside from him being intrigued by Akira’s look, Goro’s eyes are drawn to the imposing gothic platforms he's wearing. 

"I-" Akira interrupts him before he can finish his thought. It’s not like there are many thoughts going through his head in the first place, at the moment at least. Akira’s sense of style threw him for a loop, and his new and imposing height has him stammering for some cohesive understanding of what he’s feeling. 

"Amazing, right? Stand up! I’m curious about the height difference!" 

Akira looks all too happy for Goro to even attempt to refuse. Hesitantly, he slides out of the stool and looks at how the tables have turned. Normally, Goro has an inch on Akira, but with these platforms, Akira is nearly 3 inches taller than him. It feels as if the summer's warmth has found its way into Leblanc. 

Desperate to fight off the blush he feels sprouting as Akira's cool silver eyes stare happily into Goro's, Goro speaks first. 

"You're going to break your ankles." 

Akira pauses, appearing slightly embarrassed. Goro’s aware Akira knows he’s right, but before Goro can pester him more. Akira’s eyes light up as he sends him a shy grin, sounding uncertain yet content when he replies. 

"Come on, I'm pretty steady! They're surprisingly easy to walk in." 

"It didn't sound all that easy," Goro let’s his voice draw out in a dead tone - face unwavering. Akira can deny it all he wants but it’s clear how little experience he has in these shoes. Daunting as the height may be, Akira doesn’t back down, leaning forward and peering down softly at Goro. 

In response, he leans his head back slightly, their noses are close and Goro observes Akira’s face closer than he ever has before. A part of him screams to acknowledge what he feels, while the other, rather quickly, shoves that part into some dusty corner, "Well that's because I was going down the stairs. I like to walk on my toes, but with how the front curves up, I had to change that. It was pretty scary, I won’t lie." 

"Exactly my point," Goro crosses his arms, pretending to not feel anything as he looks up at Akira’s face. Akira’s unusually forward this afternoon, his confidence rivaling that of Joker. Yet, he still weaves in that touch of the gentleness he tends to let out around Goro. It’s charming, Goro will admit, but he refuses to think anymore on the matter. 

"Hah, but!” Akira pauses for effect, crouching to pull at one of the straps on his boots. He looks up through his lashes at Goro, Goro steps back slightly. 

“Look at all the buckles! I promise I'm secure." 

There are indeed a fair bit of them, as the boot reaches his mid-calf and the buckles climb their way up. But still, one wrong move and he would not be having a good time. 

"I genuinely don't think those will keep you from snapping your ankles," Goro’s eyes betray concern, and Akira’s soften in response. Goro ignores it and looks away from his too-kind gaze. 

"Okay but," He stands up and takes a step back, moving one leg forward. Akira tries to show off his shoes, arms out in front to showcase them. He directs Goro’s attention down before he chimes in again, "You cannot tell me that they don't look super-hot." 

Focusing his gaze on the shoes, Goro desperately tries to keep his face from heating up and refuses to look Akira in the eyes. He settles for a stiff: "They're. . . Interesting, I will give you that." 

Akira brings his foot back and puts his hands in his pockets before a bashful smile graces his lips at Goro's aversion. 

"Shall we take them for a test ride?" Akira sounds hesitant, with his cheeks dusted a light shade of pink. Goro's head snaps up to Akira's, he looks at him expectantly, and Goro feels like he can't settle back into an indifferent persona. 

"What do you mean?" With a failed attempt to sound neutral, Goro’s voice wavers, his eyes piercing Akira. The other bites his cheek and looks away, replying in a voice softer than he thought Akira was capable of. 

"Do you think I just brought you here to show off my new shoes? That was definitely part of it – but I also thought it could be fun to go to the jazz club together, it's been a while hasn’t it?" 

Goro crosses his arms, shoulders unconsciously crouching in as he thinks. Akira’s nervous, it’s painfully obvious as he stares at the top of Goro’s head rather than his eyes. Goro knows he shouldn't, but lord does he want to. 

He takes a deep breath. 

"I guess it has been a while. . . But I hadn't planned to be out long. Sadly, I still have work to do." 

The smile Akira had drops quickly, he brings a hand to his face to push up his glasses, before recalling they were off – it’s quite a poor attempt at seeming indifferent. 

"I guess I should’ve checked _how much_ free-time you had." 

He’s quiet, quiet with a measured voice; eyes settling into an unreadable mask. Goro can’t tell if he knows he was lying or not – in all honesty, he doesn’t want to know. 

"Probably." 

. . . 

The silence is sickening, and Goro hates himself for ruining the mood. He can't help but call himself an idiot. Akira smooths his foot across the floor and pulls at his fringe before he breaks the silence. 

"Do you at least have time for a cup of coffee? You might as well get something out of coming all this way." 

Goro wishes he had his gloves on, it takes a lot of willpower to not pick at his nails. He bites his lip and softly says: "I think there should be time." 

Akira gives him a light smile before moving behind the counter, steps uncertain and louder than usual as he dons his apron. 

They don't talk while Akira prepares the coffee. 

Goro's mind runs wild, ears ringing amongst the silence. All of this was a mistake. He should have turned Akira down when he messaged him, but what would the point of that be? To not get closer? If that’s the case, then why does he take the time to ask Akira out to places? If he wants to keep his distance, then why was he so eager to see what Akira wanted to show him. 

Akira’s face was so downtrodden at Goro refusing to go to the Jazz Jin with him. If he never went over, he wouldn't have had to see that face. 

He needs to keep his distance, he’s sure that he won’t grow attached. 

He can’t let himself. 

If he does. . . then he can’t imagine how it’ll feel when - _No. He cannot let this get in the way._

Goro’s never had to deal with this - used to not caring for whatever his future has in store. He’s supposed to be better than this. 

It’s too much, too annoying. One job, he has one job - Annoying, _Annoying, Annoying, Annoying,_ _**Annoying, Annoying -**_

After a soft ‘clink’, a cup is placed in front of him, Goro jolts and Akira’s hand twitches as he slides the cup in front of Goro. The comforting smell of Akira's coffee helps calm Goro’s tense demeanor.

His gaze moves up Akira’s retreating arm. Having to crane his head a bit higher than normal, he looks up at Akira’s hesitant expression. There’s a moment in which the ringing of silence is forgotten and all of the festering anger Goro feels settles. Akira’s gentle gaze traps Goro, like the safety on a gun. 

Akira opens and closes his lips a couple times before he speaks. 

"Akechi, are you okay?" 

Goro’s hands shake slightly at the concern. Never does a time go by in which he is able to keep his emotions in check around Akira. 

With his canines dug deep into his lips, Goro looks at Akira, doing his damnedest to appear unbothered, "Hm? What do you mean?" 

"You. . . Zoned out for a while, I thought for sure you'd find me trying to make coffee at this height funny." 

"Oh, forgive me, I had a case on the mind," Just like any lie, it comes easy with a carefree smile and closed eyes. 

"It's okay that you're busy. I'm not mad about it." 

Goro looks as Akira, shocked. He knows he shouldn’t be surprised; this is _Akira_ after all. 

He sounds so genuine and his eyes are serious with a hint of kindness. Regularly, he’d refuse to acknowledge any of this, but Goro can’t find it in him to deny it today. His fanatical mind has exhausted him, no longer up to retort, so with a simple nod he brings his attention to the coffee. It’s still hot, but the simple sip he takes proves that it is as good as usual – if not better. 

Akira looks like he's about to say something but is interrupted with the chime of Leblanc's door. 

Looking over his shoulder, Goro see's Futaba enter, carrying Morgana in her arms. She pauses, looking at the two of them. She seems to stiffen at the quiet, but before she is swept into the silence the two of them have been basking in, she scrunches her eyes at Akira. 

"Akira, why the hell are you so tall?" 

Futaba’s voice is blunt as she questions him. 

Believing that seeing is the best explanation here, Akira steps from behind the counter. He looks slightly embarrassed, the confidence of earlier not as strong. Akira rubs his wrist against his cheek, Goro can tell how much he misses the comfort of his glasses. 

Futaba’s face lifts, mouth agape at Akira’s platform shoes. 

She holds Morgana up to Akira’s face and he swats his paws at him. Akira catches one and takes the opportunity to squeeze it lightly. Morgana kicks around a little, but doesn’t seem all too upset about the situation. 

"So that's why Mona seemed so moody. You're jealous! Dumb kitty, you can't wear Demonias!" 

Morgana stops moving and his mouth drops, dumbfounded at Futaba’s comment, and he attempts to turn toward her. His voice reverberates nothing but displeasure. 

"Ugh, he was just being annoying about them! You should've seen how excited he was for Akechi to see. . ." Morgana droops in Futaba’s arms, sighing just as he did earlier, “I’m pretty sure he was talking to himself for a solid hour rehearsing what he’d.” 

Akira stampers silently, then realization floods his eyes and he seems to calm down. He must’ve remembered that Goro shouldn’t hear Morgana - a shame that he can. 

Futaba’s face lights up, some epiphany unknown to Goro dawning on her. She then turns her head to look at Goro. He himself pretends to not be affected by what he definitely did not hear from the cat. She grins, and with as condescending a tone as she can muster, she prepares to douse him in cold water, goal set to embarrass Goro. 

"Heya Akechi, so what do _you_ think about them?" 

Challenging Futaba’s stare, he gives her a patented Detective Prince chuckle and re-crosses his legs. 

"Hello Sakura, and to answer your question, they're definitely interesting. . . I’ll give him that,” He pauses to run a hand through his hair before feigning worry, “Though if anything they’re quite concern-” 

"Uh-huh. . ." She nods, interrupting him and sounding completely unconvinced. 

Cradling Morgana, she whispers to him in a not-so-subtle way to be subtle, "Yeah he totally likes them a little _too_ much." 

Goro slowly blinks and stiffens at her comment. It’s wrong of course, he is most certainly indifferent to them. There's no way something as simple as new shoes would fluster Goro. 

"Please don't whisper about me to your cat while I’m right here." Goro lets a little annoyance slip into a painfully fake chuckle. Eyes closed and smile wide; it is clear how her comment rattled him. 

Of course, Futaba presses on, grin growing, "I can't help it! And c'mon stop lying! I bet you totally didn’t expect having to look up at ‘Kira today. All dressed-up and suave,” She fails to stifle a laugh, “Your face is red ya-know~"

Shoulders stiff, Goro stands up. 

He stares Futaba down with a blank yet menacing expression. Noticing the detective’s animosity, Futaba turns to play with Morgana as if she didn’t just embarrass Goro to the point of no return. 

Placing money on Leblanc’s counter, he looks at Akira, his eyes looking toward him, though not at him. Goro’s smile is stiff and his reply curt, his heart skips and stutters along the edge of his ribcage. Face too blank, _too_ unassuming. 

This was nothing more than an off day, barely contained rage spills out in a stiff shiver, "Thank you for the coffee, I wish you luck with the shoes," Without so much as waiting for Akira’s response, he hurries out. He faintly hears Akira wish him goodbye and chides Futaba for _‘scaring him off’_. Goro clenches his fists as he heads toward the subway. 

She must’ve been trying to rile him up with baseless jokes. His face barely feels flushed. Looking at his reflection in a store's window, he sees the remanence of blush dusted across his features. Hesitant eyes, and cheeks flushed with a wobbly frown. He hates to see himself like this – he would have never guessed he’d failed so miserably to suppress his expressions. 

Was this not supposed to be about watching _Akira_ potentially make a fool out of himself? Why did things have to shift? 

It takes a lot out of him to not punch his reflection. 

He barely registers the train ride back toward his apartment. His flushed face, Akira's smile, Morgana’s annoyance, and Futaba's comments were running amuck throughout his mind. It's hard not to scowl, but being the Detective Prince, displaying even one negative emotion could lead to the tabloids going wild. He’s much too tired for that. 

With a heavy sigh out of his nose, Goro keeps his face neutral for the rest of the way with his thoughts focused on his surroundings and keeping his mask in place. 

Back in his bland apartment, Goro takes off his sweater vest and sits on his bed. Leaning over his knees with his chin resting atop his hands, Goro fumes at the vulnerability of earlier. The variety of emotions Akira makes him feel, it's refreshing yet stressful. Akira cares about ‘Akechi’, not _Goro._ Akira would cut their ties if he knew how volatile Goro actually was. Although, even when he’d slip up a little and let his guard down, Akira never minded it. If anything, he seemed _glad_ that Goro opened up to him. 

In all likelihood, Akira would be more than happy to get to know Goro more. . . It's all too confusing. He’s too used to his emotions bouncing from anger to nothing at all. 

Whatever Akira sirs in him, it has him annoyed. It's unnecessary, with December’s election fast approaching, Goro knows he has to slip his way among the Phantom Thieves. He just hopes that he can remain indifferent to it all; he has a job to do and is too far in to give in now. 

He closes his eyes, mind blank. 

His phone buzzes and it brings him back to reality. Goro rubs his hand across his face, concealer sticking to his hands. There's a new message from Akira. While wiping his hand on a napkin, he stares at the message on his lock screen, _"Sorry about Futaba, she's not too anxious anymore when around people she knows and can be *quite* the jokester. I hope she didn't upset you."_

Goro sighs, putting the napkin away, he laments, "You're getting too attached, Akira. . .” He grips his phone tightly and glares at nothing. 

After he unlocks his phone, Goro replies, _"Don't worry, I'm perfectly fine. I had to leave anyway. The coffee was great, might I add."_

_"Glad to hear!"_

The conversation can easily end there. But he doesn’t want it to, he wants to keep talking, wishes they could've had a better time in person. Akira's too dependent on others' happiness, Goro wishes Akira would do what's good for him and drop Goro. 

Goro frowns, vision cloudy and he replies to Akira, against his "better" judgement. 

_"I'll let you know if there's a day that works better for me – to go to the jazz club I mean."_

He leans back and flops onto his bed, the word "idiot" reverberating throughout his skull. Self-deprecation is tiring. 

Oh how he wishes to do nothing but sleep. 

With his eyes closed, he attempts to relax; but remembering Akira's smiling face as he shows off his platforms does little to settle his racing heart though. 

It’s been a couple minutes, but Goro's phone finally buzzes again. He rolls to his side and checks his messages. Not only is there a reply from Akira, but a picture that was sent as well. Goro's face flares at the image of Akira crouched in front of a mirror, flashing a peace sign as his shoes fail to take center stage. Akira looking smug with his tongue out grasps Goro's attention and won’t let him let go. 

He even fails to notice the messages Akira sent to accompany the image, _"Sounds good! I'm quite eager to show off these bad boys, but I'll wait to be able to do it with you. Also, I felt like you didn't appreciate my fit enough, so here you go! Enjoy and have a nice afternoon!"_

Goro slams his phone face down and screams into his bed. Emotions are hard. 

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is my first fanfic! I've written before, but this is the first time I've actually sat down to write about these two. When I got my Demonias this is essentially what I did hahahaha, except over video ofc - all my friends want me to step on them. I knew Akira would absolutely rock platforms, so I kinda had to write this ;). This was so fun to write and I've spent like all week obsessing over it ahfoishfiodshflkdhlshfjdksbgjkad.
> 
> Also these are the shoes I imagined Akira wearing: https://shoefreaks.ca/products/demonia-damned-225-boots
> 
> I've been *dying* to contribute to this fandom and so here we are! I owe my whole being to Goro and Akira - I just want them to be happy why Goro gotta be so, "Hmm why do I have feelings for u? must be hate, I guess :P"
> 
> If you're curious about future fanfics or what I'm up to you can follow me on twitter @meltheknee
> 
> I pretty much just say random thoughts and attempt to draw things.
> 
> Comments are welcomed, of course, and I hope you have a wonderful day!! Thank you for reading :D!!!


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